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It's the last day of July and I'm realizing a lot of things

July 31, 2024

It's July 31st... Summer's almost over! Okay, maybe I'm just being dramatic because we technically still have like a month or so left of summer, but the realization that today is the last day of July and tomorrow is when August begins just hit me. I can't believe we're already more than halfway thru the year 😭 Next thing you know, it'll be Christmas! (yayy) To be honest, I feel like I didn't do too much this summer. I only just got a job like 2 weeks ago, and I've only gone to the beach like once. I'm not obsessed with the beach or anything, but I feel like it's fun when you go with the right people. I've barely gone out of the house, I feel like. I kinda wish I had gotten a job earlier this summer so I could have money and actually do stuff, but what can you do? Classes start in August, and I've never studied and had a job at the same time, so this will definitely be interesting. Some good news though, I'm finally getting a car!!! One of my neighbors was selling her daughter's old car cuz she was moving to Chicago to study and my mom told me about it. So I talked to my dad and we arranged that he would take out a loan and I would help pay it off with my new job and now tomorrow we're gonna meet with our neighbor to do the sale! I think. I don't know how any of this works. I've been a passenger princess my whole life LMAO so this whole having a car business is new to me. It's a (Ami) Suzuki car from 2012 (or 2011) and it has a CD PLAYER which i'm sooooo happy about because cars nowadays don't come with CD players. it doesn't come with bluetooth i don't think but it does have an AUX cord, which I guess if i wanna connect it to my phone i'll need an adapter or something, but maybe not cuz i do wanna get an MP3 player at some point cuz Spotify has been pissing me off lately and I need to free some space in my phone if i want it to last. it has its faults, and i need to take care of it an extra amount bcuz Suzuki cars and parts aren't sold in PR anymore, but it seems to work just fine and I'm sooooo happy that now i won't be as limited as i was before, at the mercy of my parents, friends, Ubers, taxis or just my friends. I do wish I didn't need to own a car, though. But with the way my city (and literally all of Puerto Rico) is designed, it's just not very plausible to be a pedestrian + Uber fares are expensive as hell, taxis usually only take cash (which I should have on hand but alas), and public trasnport is not super reliable. In a perfect world, I could just walk to wherever I needed or wanted to go without feeling like I was gonna get run over all the time or melting in 90°+ degree weather, but what can you do?

With so many changes in my life now, the realization is setting in that I am an adult. I'm not trying to be all "woe is me i'm so old now even though i'm only 20" but I still feel somewhat like a child, and the fact that now i'm gonna be faced with alllllll sorts of adult responsibilities... it's a little scary. Anyways, there's no point in dwelling on that right now. Getting older also means lots of great and also fun opportunities will knock at my door, and if anything I feel more excitement than I do fear. Maybe it's just my naïveté and maybe that's the reason why I still feel like a kid, but I don't think growing up means losing that spark and joy of life. The strongest thing one can do is maintaining that even though the world constantly feels like it's gonna implode in on itself. I'm so glad I have friends and family that support me through everything, and I'm so grateful for them because I know not everyone has that. I wanna be that for people who don't. So let me tell you, yes you the reader, right now: everything that we put our minds to will work out just fine, and if it doesn't? you can always get back up and try again :) never forget that!

xoxo,

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